by Pamela Shaw
Everything in our life is a metaphor and can be reflected in the seasons, nature, the little things in our life, our struggles, challenges and triumphs. From how we feel in autumn and winter, to the emotions we experience regularly and the foods we crave and desire: it's all connected. In this podcast, Pamela delves into the connections between life, nature, Chinese Medicine, neuroplasticity, our emotional landscapes, and more. <br/><br/><a href="https://pamelashaw.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast">pamelashaw.substack.com</a>
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April 6, 2025
<p>I was going to share a post today on being comfortable with discomfort, to reveal the lessons and blessings as a result of this action, but I have a little story/allegory to tell instead…</p><p>Once upon the end of a spring Shabbat dinner in the suburbs of Richmond, a parent said that the world is a terrifying and scary place. Their child, who was standing next to them, said, “what?! It’s scary?!” eyes as big as saucers. She couldn’t comprehend how her perspective of the world being a good/safe/fun/magical place was… wrong, shaken, misplaced. You could feel the fear and confusion rolling off her.</p><p><p>It's All Connected is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.</p></p><p>Without batting an eye, and not because of the child but because I think we all need to be reminded of this (me included), I said, “hey, I think the world is what we make of it. It’s up to us to decide how we approach it, life is great no matter what’s going on or not going on.” The child’s eyes widened, a bit of relief softening her face, yet confused after hearing two adults say two diametrically opposed things.The parent, I don’t remember what the parents said…(Gratitude to my parents, especially my mom, for always being that “life is what you make of it” person in my life. She’s amazing.)</p><p>Presuming that we’re all adults here: we can hold two perspectives, two emotions, at once, right? Two things can be true at the same time. (At least, that’s what my aim is, and I have varying levels of success with this on a given day.)</p><p>To say, “hey, sh*t’s real right now, and we’re bombarded with zaniness and disruption every day that is meant to remind us all how life is not predictable. And wow, right on time, predictably and magically the cherry tree on the block is gorgeous, and all is right with the world because the birds are out and the bees are buzzing, and I’m alive.” It’s about being comfortable with the discomfort of living in an “uncertain” world. </p><p>Yet so much is indeed certain. I know within a week or so when the violets will be ready in my yard for picking and drying. I know when the wild strawberries will be ready way upstate NY (even though I haven’t been for this harvest since 2021). I know the smell of rain, that the sun will rise tomorrow morning. (Hey, maybe this is about being comfortable with the discomfort after all!)</p><p>Every day in the news there are dozens of headlines that make even the most resilient optimist shudder. </p><p>Yet, it’s our responsibility to make the most out of each day. </p><p><strong>We only have this one life, how do you want to spend it?</strong> It’s both, and, right? Not either or. </p><p>(And, if it was either or, I’d choose to make the most out of each day after living in the other side for the first part of my life.)</p><p>Sitting around, getting each other worked up in a frenzy of fear is not going to do anything but make life feel zanier and more disrupted and scarier. At least for me. It doesn’t help me feel like I’m “doing something”, it makes me feel like I’m stuck in traffic yelling at the people around me. </p><p>Instead, what if we instead become grounded in ourselves, get quiet and in the present moment? Then, we can tune in and hear our Hearts -which only know love and joy anyway- live unattached to “certainty” via the present moment. Because then, no matter what happens… we’ve got this. Yes, our Hearts only know and resonate with love and joy. </p><p>Our Hearts are innocent in that way. </p><p>Sure, your Heart can become closed off, then hardened and bitter as a result; but we are not born this way, we do not thrive this way. If we feel fear (an emotion of the Kidneys, of Water), the fire of our Hearts shudder and shiver in response. When we feel anger (the emotion of Liver and Wood) we can create larger fires and our Hearts rage without consciousness and loving kindness. If grief-stricken (a Lung/Metal emotion), our Hearts can feel heavy and shattered, brittle almost, at what is lost - and can become stuck in the past, out of sync with who we are in the present moment. If we are stuck in worry (a Spleen/Earth emotion), our hearts seek sympathy and nurturing from others to soothe our weary soul. We can also be filled with desire for more stimulation, more excitement, and have a sort of FOMO of the “fun things” in life, and through that, our hearts become exhausted, hungover, overstimulated and out of sync with the natural rhythms of our lives. </p><p>Even through all of this, our Hearts keep beating, singing the song of our souls, of love and joy and peace if only we take the time to be present, to be still enough to listen. </p><p>The Heart is an organ of the Fire element. And Fire, like the sun, exists only in this moment in time. It cannot be captured, or held, or stored. (Think of how hot the desert sun is, but once it is set for the night, the desert temperature can drop enormously.) Your Heart holds the spark of your life, the joy and love in your life. </p><p>Healthy Heart energy can unify us with the Heavens/Universe/Oneness/God/Spirit/Gaia. This energy can lift us up, and fill us with light and faith, positivity (without naivete) and what’s called right-action.</p><p>With a lack of Fire in our Hearts, we are unable to utilize our spark of innate joy to live our best lives. With too much Fire in our Hearts, we are so concerned with wanting and getting more of what brings us one type of joy that we lose perspective on life and can become controlling.</p><p>Either way, the Heart is unable to turn the feast of life’s joys into insight, intimacy, mastery, living through doing nothing (wu wei), propriety (which is right action at the right time) and sageliness (thoughtfulness, carefulness, compassion, kindness).</p><p>For if all we’re doing is listening to the noise of our minds, or the news, or the fears of others, then we’re ignoring the most healing and helpful sound of all: the beating and song of our own Hearts. When we live from our Hearts, in tune with our Heart’s song, then this resonates to others. Others can then join together in harmony and then rise in a sense of unification, attunement, love and joy – the beating of a drum.</p><p>Let’s remember that this is not just for you or for me, but for each other, for our loved ones, for our friends, for our community, for the world.</p><p>It’s up to each of us to focus on the good (not just the gloriousness of spring, but also the actions we need to take to help make the world a better place*) and what we CAN do today that helps make things better.</p><p>And yes, of course, rally, protest, organize, take action where you feel compelled to! Use your money for the things that you care about so that additional ACTION is being taken to support the causes that you care about. Be proactive, not reactive.</p><p>When life is reminding us that everything is uncertain, for to live is to be in a state of uncertainty: it's up to each of us to decide what song to sing and dance to.</p><p>I for one, prefer to tune into my Heart, and live life from my Heart’s song. What about you?</p><p>***********************************************************************************************************</p><p>If you liked this post, please hit the heart button!</p><p>If you resonated with something here, I’d love to know what it brought up for you (comment below).</p><p>And, if you think someone would like this post too… feel free to share it.</p><p>Please consider subscribing (as a free or paid subscriber) - it means the world to me, and encourages me to keep sharing with you!</p><p>* Think of how Gandhi’s resistance against British colonial rule was not fighting against the British, but instead via non-violent and non-compliant action. The resistance was done so from a place of proactive dignity and honor, from a place of solution, of how he wanted India to be.Martin Luther King Jr led the civil rights movement by being a living example through speech and action for how he wanted the country to be. He lived and spoke from that place as if it already existed.</p><p><p>It's All Connected is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.</p></p> <br/><br/>This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit <a href="https://pamelashaw.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2">pamelashaw.substack.com/subscribe</a>
January 20, 2025
<p></p><p>One of the energies that I get to dance with in this life is having Wei Qi issues.</p><p>Some people may have constitutional energies with anger, or persistent grief and sadness, or always needing things to be happy or easygoing, or fearfulness. Which energy you dance with in this lifetime is unique to you, and it’s something we can work through and learn from.</p><p>(While I’m not sure these energies can completely be overcome in one lifetime, I think that we can choose to have increasing awareness around and eventually move into a healthier and more balanced way of being. At one point I thought I could overcome anything through the right diet, herbs, lifestyle and sheer force of will. Now… I’m not so sure. Maybe I’ll change my mind about this all in the future, who knows.)</p><p>Again, the energy that I dance with in this lifetime is Wei Qi. Wei Qi is sort of like an amalgamation of the boundary between you and the world, your immune system, and is the combination of the health of your digestive system (Spleen/Stomach) and your respiratory system (Lung/Large Intestine).</p><p>This is the Metal and Earth of your body’s kingdom. Coincidentally enough or not, I am a Metal-Earth constitution in Five Element Chinese Medicine.</p><p>I view Wei Qi as the castle that’s made from stone and is protected with metal gates and guards at the gates and parapets.</p><p>I remember when I briefly dated someone who so wanted to come crashing through my carefully built castle.</p><p>During this period of time, I had a vision in a meditation of me being in a tower, and them pulling stones down one by one, and crashing through the portcullis (the metal gate).</p><p>This vision terrified me, and for good reason: it was not ME opening the gates for them to enter my kingdom, or me relaxing so the guards protecting me could relax - but them breaking down the protection between me and the world. It wasn’t a healing vision, but one of personal destruction. I was, in essence, engaged in a battle between what was best for me, and what they wanted. (Now, I want to be clear: this was a vision, so all of this is symbolic. I was and am safe/okay/good.)</p><p>It is each of our responsibility to honor what the regal one’s deem to be desirable, worthy, correct, healthy, wise for us. And if given the choice, the doors of not only the outer castle can be opened, but all the inner chamber ones as well. You, me, we, are the regal ones at the center of our kingdoms.</p><p>This means that since you are the Empress/Emperor/Sovereign being/etc of your world: YOU are the one who makes the choices as to who is to enter your world.</p><p>How you make those decisions is unique to you, but make them you do. And, who you let into your inner world is also up to you. This is YOUR choice, as the sovereign ruler of your personal kingdom.</p><p>To have a vision of someone that I was dating trying to tear down the sacredness of my personal kingdom felt… unsafe. It felt like a violation of my boundaries, even though no external/waking world violations had ever taken place (an example might be: speaking in a way that is disrespectful).</p><p>This is when things get nuanced.</p><p>Because Wei Qi is nuanced.</p><p>After all, it not only prevents the little bugs from getting us sick, it also protects our energy from other’s energy.</p><p>Know someone who seems to “catch” everyone else’s emotions and is very sensitive to other people’s energy in a way that makes that person sick or otherwise unwell in some way? Yup, that’s Wei Qi.</p><p>It’s also empathy, but there’s healthy empathy where Wei Qi is strong, and there’s unhealthy empathy where the Wei Qi is compromised so you “take on” whatever it is that you are in empathy with.</p><p>Because Wei Qi is connected to the health of your Lungs (or Metal element), it is very primal, it’s animalistic, it’s instinctual. And because it is also connected to your digestive system, you can only make more Wei Qi when you are inherently feeling safe (you know: rest and digest.)</p><p>Wei Qi is the way in which you respond to the stimuli in the world – but in an unconscious manner.</p><p>You are not consciously controlling your body’s response to being exposed to a virus, your body senses it and kicks into gear. That process is your Wei Qi.</p><p>So if you have some kind of Wei Qi issue… maintaining the “boundary” of health can be challenging.</p><p>You could be more prone to getting sick. Or, like me, your immune system can hold up for so long then suddenly collapse into sickness that lingers. It’s that one drop that broke through the dam, the one snowflake too many that created an avalanche.</p><p>Take, for instance how I managed to not get sick at all even though I was feeling really run down, then as soon as I went on vacation, I got sick. Held out, then collapse.</p><p>(Thankfully, in some ways, I’ve become wiser and I just rest rest rest rest rest while feeling sick. I rest until I’m sick of resting then rest a bit more. My friend Rebecca wrote about recovery <a target="_blank" href="https://open.substack.com/pub/rebeccajaltman/p/how-to-win-at-recovering?r=1qsnt1&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false">here</a>, should you want to learn more about it. Doing this, resting while sick, helps your Wei Qi because it’s not being depleted or stretched thin by managing recovery along with newness.)</p><p>On an emotional level, you can have a situation where someone wears you down over time by requesting the same thing that you’ve already said no to, again, and again, and again. Maybe you’ve even set a hard boundary about it, but they keep coming back and you eventually find yourself saying yes. That’s Wei Qi.</p><p>On a psychological level, I view Wei Qi being compromised as that which we are choosing to expose ourselves to upsetting images, media, news, people, etc which leave us feeling upset, anxious, depleted, or otherwise emotionally unwell. Compromising our Wei Qi can also come in the form of people with boundary issues. (Ever be around someone who hates other people’s boundaries and takes them personally? Yeah, that gets exhausting in time – especially when you might not be able to take the personal space to recoup between these “incidents” and develop more of a strong Wei Qi!)Being able to not necessarily withstand the impact from that subtle energy, but be unaffected by that energy is to have healthy Wei Qi.</p><p>And because this is Chinese Medicine at play here, and Wei Qi is ruled by the digestive and respiratory systems: taking care of your digestive health is of the utmost importance: eat right, do not eat and run, do not eat while standing, eat while sitting, eat with others, if you do not eat with others (as I do) then play music that you find enjoyable, avoid working while eating, etc. (Shameless plug for my self-published cookbook which you can buy <a target="_blank" href="https://myautoimmunekitchen.com/product/my-autoimmune-kitchen-cookbook-paperback/">here</a> or <a target="_blank" href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0C91ZLNJ9">here</a>). Your respiratory health is of no less importance: wear the scarves in windy weather, be mindful of the air quality, eat Lung supportive foods (ie cooked pears in fall and winter, soups and stews), have the right amount of humidity in the air, etc.</p><p>There are herbs you can take to boost Wei Qi too (think: immune supportive herbs), you can soothe your nervous system to remind yourself that you are safe in your body. (Remember: the Wei Qi is primal, the nervous system is primal, if both of these deeply instinctual animal bodily functions are at ease then everything else functions better). Get good rest, avoid overworking, allow your Wei Qi to replenish at night. Interestingly enough, your Wei Qi circulates on the exterior of your body during the day, and moves to the inside of your body at night. So get that good restorative sleep, and if you do not sleep well: do what you can to sleep better!</p><p>I’ve been working on my Wei Qi in a more conscious manner the past couple+ years, and just as I felt great I fell off taking the herbs that were supporting my Wei Qi. (Oh to be human!) I realized that I felt a great amount of space and neutrality between me and the “outside world” – which was strange because I was always REALLY sensitive to other people’s emotions, moods, speech, etc. But, life life’d, and alongside falling off the herbal routine, I got physically and mentally exhausted (working and going to school part-time in your mid-40s is no joke). In time, sure enough… I agreed to do something that I initially had a “no” response to. The repetitive nature of the thing was what broke through my Wei Qi, and right up until I hit the point of exhaustion coupled with not taking the herbs, I had felt inner strength, space and fortitude.</p><p>My initial reaction to this recent Wei Qi breakdown was to feel shame, and to give myself a hard time about it. But, shaming myself or “cutting myself down” (with an emotional Metal object) would only weaken my Wei Qi further (and, interestingly enough, this yes-when-I-really-meant-no welcomed back the headaches that I had been free from for months.) It would serve no benevolent, loving, purpose to continue berating myself, for it would only keep my Wei Qi in a broken down state but also not honor my process or self.</p><p>Instead, accepting and loving myself unconditionally, being aware of where I’m at and what I still need to do, are most important.</p><p>Also, as someone who is a Metal constitution who seeks the perfection that Metal desires: I have to remind myself that I’m human having a human, messy experience…</p><p>Now I know: back to the Wei Qi herbs, back to being more conscious about it, and doing all the things stated above to cultivate and maintain healthy and strong Wei Qi.</p><p>***********************************************************************************************************</p><p>If you liked this post, please hit the heart button! If you resonated with something here, I’d love to know what it brought up for you (comment below). And, if you think someone would like this post too… feel free to share it. Please consider subscribing (as a free or paid subscriber) - it means the world to me, and encourages me to keep sharing with you!</p> <br/><br/>This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit <a href="https://pamelashaw.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2">pamelashaw.substack.com/subscribe</a>
October 26, 2024
<p>I’ve recently received some news that could be perceived as a setback.</p><p>I spent a good amount of time wallowing in what it all could mean, feeling upset, resentful and angry about this particular bit of news. And, essentially, trying to talk myself off the edge of the cliff of despair*.Writing this out makes it sound like this news is life-alteringly huge.</p><p><p>It's All Connected is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.</p></p><p>It really isn’t in the grand scheme of things, but it is about my health.</p><p>I have a lot of “stuff” (baggage) regarding my health. For years I was told there was nothing wrong with me, then found out I had autoimmunity (which was, not-coincidentally, what was in fact “wrong” with me), then made big changes to help said autoimmunity, and it’s basically been one thing after the other. And, as a woman in the US… medical gaslighting is real, dismissal of our health concerns as being “hormonal” or “in our heads” is real. Having a complex health picture in this day and age has meant that I’ve gone down an “alternative” path and not found help or solace within most of the modern medical community. (And, of course the irony in this is that modern medicine formally diagnosed the autoimmune condition, and I rely on it to see where things are.) </p><p>Going down the alternative path, via Chinese Medicine and herbs, has meant that I get to zoom out, take a look at the whole picture of patterns in not just my health but my overall life.</p><p>Having a big picture look at my health has made things markedly better.</p><p>It seems health is my life-lesson, the source of growth, love, acceptance and compassion for me. It’s the thing I’m here to put effort into so that I can glean some sort of wisdom about.</p><p>Sort of like how for a lot of people, their children are their greatest teachers, or their relationship with their spouse is their greatest source of growth, for me –apparently, at this moment in time- it is health stuff.</p><p>I must put energy and intention and effort into my health in order to feel good. This isn’t to say that all people have to take care of themselves to feel good, but I need to do “extra” in order to feel good for me. (And, after all, that’s why I’m here writing to you – to share what I’ve learned.)</p><p>Sometimes, I get so sick of having to, what feels like, jump through hoops just to feel good and solid on a daily basis. Sometimes, I hate it. Sometimes, I just want to do what I want, eat what I want, and live my life without any “price to pay” afterwards. (Don’t we all, right?!) I want to throw all of it away and do what I want. And knowing that I can’t when all I want is the opposite of what I have, ends up in this weird temper tantrum pity party thing.</p><p>(Ironically, when I think back on what I ate to make it through all-nighters in college, I cringe. Giant cups of Dr. Pepper, junk food, brownies/cookies, pizza – all to fuel staying up all night. Then at the end of the semester, or during a break, I’d do nothing but sleep and get sick with a cold. Even then, my body protested the thing that I have long romanticized.)</p><p>I think part of this is feeling like the grass is greener, that IF ONLY I could have this thing that I cannot seem to have, then everything would be fantastic. Sort of like how people romanticize relationships making life perfect and fantastic – that life would be oh so much better if only the perfect partner were to enter your life. (Folks in relationships will laugh at this, but we see it all the time in TV and movies as being the thing that will “fix” everything, yeah?)</p><p>Not having health-things to think about, to eat for, to orient my day around, is my fantasy.</p><p>The irony, of course, is how amazing I’ve been feeling lately.</p><p>I mean, SO amazing.</p><p>And maybe that’s why this health news has me shook up. Because I was expecting to see something different than I did, because my every day reality is so much better than what the results showed. And I’ve only been feeling this amazing because I haven’t been fighting myself on what I need in order to feel good.</p><p>Go to bed at 9:30 and get up at 7:30? Needed 1-2 nights a week? Okay, do that.</p><p>Not force myself to lift weights for 60 mins a week because it’s “necessary” for our health, but is actually really draining if I do more than 10-15 mins a week? Yeah, do what’s best for me not what “everyone” should be doing.</p><p>I do one thing at a time, I no longer multitask.</p><p>I take 20-30 mins to eat a meal, I meditate in the morning, I take time to marvel and be in nature in some way every day. I spend time with friends, and do things that I love (though, admittedly, with school this part of my life has taken the biggest hit this semester.) I am not working, including schoolwork and yard chores, on weekends so I can full rejuvenate for the week ahead. I’m hiring people to help me so that I can spend more time resting, which is exactly what I need to be doing in order to feel as good as I’ve been feeling.This is practicing what I preach to others.</p><p>Living a life of balance, not go go go go go as if I were an unbreakable machine.</p><p>So to have this piece of news be received now is like a wrench in what’s otherwise been smooth sailing.</p><p>But, that’s life right? We get a gift of smooth sailing, relax into the calm waters, think we’ve “made it” with bright clear skies (or if partial clouds are your thing then that), easy navigation.</p><p>It’s temporary, because there is sure to be rough waters in some form ahead. And I feel like this news is a hint of that rough water. I’ve been here before, having to make YET MORE CHANGES (ugh, I’m so tired of change right now – I’ve had enough change in four years to last me four more years), and my mind is spinning all sorts of tails about “what it all means”. These thoughts, of course, lead right into those very rough waters and make them seem un-navigable. These thoughts and the emotions they conjure up could be making rough water where there is none!</p><p>This news could simply be a navigational course correction. It could lead to something even better. Who knows?! And to honor the course correct that the new brings, or be patient enough to wait for more information, is far far more productive than falling off the cliff of despair.</p><p>It would be nice to wake up one day and not have any of the things I have to think about for my health.</p><p>And I certainly am putting more energy and effort into living life than worry about health things (which, unsurprisingly, has helped my health far more than worrying about it ever did.)</p><p>But, I have the gift of being able to make the changes to help my health.</p><p>If only I did not fight it so, or resist and even hate the process so much at times.</p><p>Instead, I have to trust that showing up with love, care, compassion, and meet my needs in a way that is pretty different than what I’d otherwise be doing (yet is rather common sense).</p><p>With clients, we often hit this very same point in our work together. And, sadly, a lot of folks take it as a sign to NOT keep going. Not TO keep going. I always get excited when we get to this point because it’s a reminder, always a reminder, of the stark contrast of the way life was before-change and now after-change.</p><p>It’s a point that so often most clients decide that if they’re feeling great, and come to a bump in the road, it means that you’re on the wrong road. But if you were NOT feeling great, then changed roads, then started feeling great, then a little bump is just that. A bump. No big deal. Sort of like turbulence in the air. Doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be in an airplane, it just means the winds have shifted.</p><p>Perhaps all of these things can be seen as tests of our resolve.</p><p>Like any change in life, things that come up after things have been going well… they happen. Doesn’t mean things are “all wrong”.</p><p>Our resolve to continue on this new path, to have faith that we’ll continue feeling better. That we’ll continue to BE better.</p><p>If you give up now, you turn back, then get back on that same old trodden path of feeling like crap (could be with your health, your mental state, your relationships, your work, you name it, right?) If you give up, you’ve lost.</p><p>Obviously giving up at the appropriate time is recommended! If the road is ALWAYS rough, with some smooth spots, that’s not a road to be on. Been there… done that. We don’t live for the smooth spots amidst a consistently rough road.</p><p>I realized that if I get on a path that is smooth, and trust that things will work out however they’re meant to work out so long as I show up in this way, in the way that is a continual showing of all that I want to be, my internal emotional waters calm right down, I feel better and more connected to the source-of-wellness within, and forget about the cliff.</p><p>Makes any sort of news or results pretty insignificant.</p><p></p><p>*The cliff of despair, or the pit of despair, or “the pit”, is where I lived for a long time. It’s a hopeless, sad, frightful place. It’s scary, and very difficult to get out of. It’s filled with all the feelings that do not make your life better: fear, anger, dread, sadness, grief, hatred, worry, loathing, longing, victim-hood, and emotions that I have no words for. Live life from a place that is not yours, not meant for you, not driven by you, and you can fall off the cliff into the pit of despair.</p><p><p>It's All Connected is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.</p></p> <br/><br/>This is a public episode. If you’d like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit <a href="https://pamelashaw.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2">pamelashaw.substack.com/subscribe</a>
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