by Elaine Halligan and Melissa Hood
Welcome to The Parent Practice Podcast, the show for anyone who cares for and about children. We know you want your children to be happy, confident and successful and that you do your best to be a good parent. Sometimes you probably beat yourself up for not being good enough. Good parenting can be simple if you know how. We can support you here by exploring a range of topics to enable you to feel calmer and happier and to help you get that parenting manual you wish you'd had from the beginning. We are your hosts, Melissa Hood and Elaine Halligan. We’re passionate about positive parenting. We’ve developed expertise built up over many years of working with families. In this podcast we interview a whole range of different people in differing fields from authors, to therapists, to clinicians. They all have fascinating insights into this messy world of raising and educating kids. We share our experiences of raising our families. Between us we have 5 now-adult children and one and a half grandchildren and we walk the talk every day using these skills with our families. In the interests of celebrating perfect imperfection in every episode you’ll hear from our guests about one of their own low parenting moments and their top tips for raising happy, confident and successful children.
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July 24, 2020
<p>If you’re feeling really over the whole pandemic thing this episode will lift your spirits.</p> <p>The Covid-19 pandemic has certainly changed our lives. We’ve been forced to accept changes to the way we live in order to try to control the disease, some of which have been inconvenient, to say the least. Some families have found the enforced lockdown extremely difficult and for some isolation has really affected their mental wellbeing. But it hasn’t been all bad.</p> <p>Carl Honoré has written extensively about the benefits of slowing down –he calls it embracing our ‘inner tortoise’ - and recently he has been musing about how Covid might be just the force that compels us to slow down with all the benefits that brings us and our families.</p> <p>Listen to this episode with Carl if you want to learn:</p> <ul> <li>What the detrimental effects are on us of the busy way we live our lives and what are the prices we pay, the things we sacrifice, for our ‘roadrunner’ lives, the biggest of which are human connection and opportunities for self-reflection</li> <li>How the cult of productivity has grown up in pursuit of the perfect CV but as a consequence children lose may the ability to think and be creative</li> <li>How attentiveness, presence, joy, good health and love can be lost in the rush from one activity to another</li> <li>How your children can really enjoy activities if they winnow down to a few that they really love. Top tip: you’ll know your child is really passionate about an activity if they talk about it even when they’re not doing it</li> <li>How ‘buffer moments’ between activities are essential for processing and building memories</li> <li>How to create conversation time in which you really get to know your child and indeed yourself</li> <li>What some of the lessons of Covid might be, what aspects of lockdown do we want to retain and what do we want to be different when we go back to ‘normal’</li> <li>How productivity can be increased when people have more autonomy</li> <li>How important it is to remember what we value and what we’ve learnt from our pandemic experience. Memory is impacted by living life too fast so Carl encourages us to write down our thoughts about this to avoid forgetting when life speeds up again, maybe in the form of a family mission statement</li> </ul> <p>You’ll enjoy his very simple top tip for raising children to slow down and be adults who have more balance in their lives.</p> <p>If you want to get in touch with Carl check out the links below:</p> <p><strong>Links</strong></p> <p><a href= "https://www.facebook.com/carl.honore">https://www.facebook.com/carl.honore</a></p> <p><a href= "https://twitter.com/carlhonore">https://twitter.com/carlhonore</a></p> <p><a href= "https://www.linkedin.com/in/carl-honor%C3%A9-81806ab3/">https://www.linkedin.com/in/carl-honor%C3%A9-81806ab3/</a></p> <p><a href= "https://www.instagram.com/carlhonore/">https://www.instagram.com/carlhonore/</a></p>
July 17, 2020
<p>We are all aware that anxiety is a growing problem amongst our littlies, our tweens and our teens, and a recent Bristol University Longitudinal study ( ALPSAC) has identified that anxiety amongst our young people, children and teenagers has risen over the past 3 months of the pandemic from 13% to 24% during the crisis. So this podcast helps parents understand it and most importantly gives some top tips re what can be done to manage anxiety, reduce stress and how to respond to it.</p> <p>Our guest today is Juliet Richards, who has been part of the facilitation team here at The Parent Practice since 2008, after taking our Positive Parenting Course in 2004 and then the Train the Trainer course in 2008. She’s also a school governor and is the safeguarding lead in a private girls school in London.</p> <p>After her training with The Parent Practice, she realised what an impact the techniques and ideas were going to have on her family and others. Creating a positive atmosphere, and seeing how she could help them behave well and find their way in the world, was very different to feeling her responsibility was simply to keep them out of trouble. As her sons have grown, the parenting skills have continued to enable her to feel that she is on the same side as her boys and her and her husband are able to actively pass on the values that they feel are important</p> <p>She leads our <a href= "https://www.theparentpractice.com/events-calendar">HARMONY AT HOME 6 week course and Zoom webinars</a> on a variety of topics and is an adept facilitator with a clear, empathetic and humorous style.</p> <p>In this episode we look at how to spot anxiety, how to understand it and most importantly how to teach your children to deal with it</p> <p>Listen to this episode with Juliet if you want to learn:</p> <ul> <li>How challenging it is to parent, and how easy it is to feel isolated and scared when you as a parent may be anxious.</li> <li>How parents can empower their children by starting to understand themselves and equipping themselves with positive parenting skills</li> <li>What anxiety is? What is developmentally normal?</li> <li>How to deal with anxiety and know when to intervene and not escalate and catastrophise and heighten the situation.</li> <li>The idea that prevention is better than cure</li> <li>The importance of modelling and how contagious anxiety is</li> <li>How important it is for schools to support parents by <a href= "https://www.theparentpractice.com/programmes/parenting-workshops-in-schools"> delivering parenting workshops</a> on topics such as anxiety</li> <li>How our brain works in terms of the ‘Worry Brain’ and the ‘Smart Brain’ as defined by Tamar Chansky</li> <li>The importance of being an emotion coach for our kids and enabling them to talk to us about their fears and worries</li> <li>How useful a worry box can be for children to download their negative thoughts and how to set up chatty time on the sofa as a daily ritual to allow children to worry openly</li> <li>The importance of teaching your children calming techniques as part of everyday life</li> </ul> <p>Juliet shares huge vulnerability with one of her low parenting moments where she says to her boys, she no longer wants to be their Mummy and she shares that the greatest gift we can give our children is to look after ourselves and our own happiness.</p> <p>If you are interested in doing a 6 week Harmony at Home course or a webinar on anxiety or booking a school workshop, check out the links below</p> <p><strong>Links</strong></p> <p>Harmony at Home Course and Webinars with The Parent Practice</p> <p><a href= "https://www.theparentpractice.com/events-calendar">https://www.theparentpractice.com/events-calendar</a></p> <p>School workshop to support parents</p> <p><a href= "https://www.theparentpractice.com/programmes/parenting-workshops-in-schools"> https://www.theparentpractice.com/programmes/parenting-workshops-in-schools</a></p> <p><strong>Books</strong></p> <p>Alicia Eaton -First Aid for your Child’s Mind</p> <p>Tamar Chansky - Freeing your Child from Anxiety</p> <p>Lawrence Cohen - The Opposite of Worry</p> <p><strong>Resources</strong></p> <p>Place to be -<a href= "https://www.place2be.org.uk/">https://www.place2be.org.uk/</a></p> <p>Young Minds - <a href= "https://youngminds.org.uk/">https://youngminds.org.uk/</a></p> <p>Child Mind institute -<a href= "https://childmind.org/">https://childmind.org/</a></p> <p>Anxiety UK -<a href= "https://www.anxietyuk.org.uk/">https://www.anxietyuk.org.uk/</a></p>
July 10, 2020
<p>Some of you will have children who have already returned to school, albeit part time, and some of you will have children who will be returning for the first time in September, so this episode has relevance for everybody whatever transition you are going through. Some children are terribly excited about going back and some are quite apprehensive. And parents may have mixed feelings too.</p> <p>Our guest today is Louise Treherne who is Head of Character Education at ‘Role Models’, an organisation which supports children to be resilient and creative problem solvers.</p> <p>Louise has a degree in Psychology, 12 years’ experience as a teacher and 5 years as a Senior Deputy Head at a London Prep school. She now works as a qualified coach working 1:1 with adults, teenagers and children to help them move forward with specific goals, explore limiting beliefs and develop their direction and confidence.</p> <p> ‘Role Models’ has a programme of life skill courses for children age 5-11. Louise has developed this programme with new and exciting ways to help children explore the four key areas of resilience, leadership, creative problem solving and collaboration, in order to be the best version of themselves and reach their potential.</p> <p>In this episode we look at how to manage children’s worries, what modelling parents need to do, and how to help your child focus on positive conversations, talking about what’s in or out of one’s control. We talk about the importance of the ‘soft skills’ for children and also for ourselves as adults have to cope with transition too. We all have feelings about returning to school that we may need support with.</p> <p>Listen to this episode with Louise if you want to learn:</p> <ul> <li>What ‘character education’ is (as defined by the Department for Education)</li> <li>Why parents should focus on positive conversations about going back to school and not project adult feelings onto the children while allowing children to express any anxieties they may have. (Emotion coaching will be a familiar skill for regular Parent Practice Podcast listeners)</li> <li>Talk to children about what they can control and what they can’t and put their energy into the former</li> <li>About the worry box and how that can help children, and adults, to compartmentalise their worries and preserve energy for other things</li> <li>How vital adult support (from parents and teachers) is for children right now to look after their mental health(especially 5-11 year olds because they are developing crucial skills in this age group)</li> <li>About what might be difficult for children to cope with on return to school, including socialising, and how we can prepare them for that: <ul> <li>How allowing an adjustment period might be what your child needs</li> <li>Acknowledging feelings of overwhelm and anxiety about separation from family, and having simple strategies like a note in the lunch box or have a matching drawing on both parent and child’s wrist that each can look at</li> <li>Helping your child Identify 3 things to talk to friends about</li> <li>Reminding them that communication is just as much about listening as speaking –preparing some questions might be helpful</li> <li>Developing rituals of connection on their return home at the end of the day</li> <li>Using love-bombing</li> </ul> </li> <li>How Role Models workshops for children can help them build resilience, leadership, creative problem solving and collaboration through experiential learning techniques, including helping a child really develop a growth mindset around challenging problems</li> <li>How it helps to teach children to identify what learning zones they are in for different activities, about neuroplasticity and about the power of their thoughts in shaping their feelings and their actions</li> <li>How to help children feel they have more control over their own lives</li> <li>How helpful it can be to put structure and routines back in place sometime before school goes back, including practicing the school route which might allow all the feelings to be aired</li> </ul> <p>Louise shares her top tip for preparing children to return to school and for them to be happy, confident and successful and a surprising uplifting moment that has come out of the past few months.</p> <p>If you want to get in touch with Louise and Role Models check out the links below:</p> <p><strong>Links</strong></p> <p>Online: <a href= "https://url.emailprotection.link/?bLXQgRpMfgtqat6H5B4OvWLKxgX8rmeARcIQ_6wM0jm04jSJSP9_nQWE_496EjIKpQsQpPabZtV2oCROC4TZlENKdVXztP2DwUhvtHTY6wdf4LiEEF2BEsUpX19N4ic2y"> https://www.rolemodels.me/courses/online-learning/</a></p> <p>Offline: <a href= "https://url.emailprotection.link/?by8DtF9PIFpXR6pwrospIFS5St7Ap3KqYHMa5pY9fgUVVp8FE9W_j3pQhZkTJNZsYAVF4_Mggl3oCDeoCqHEgj8-26hNjwnqDxOcbYWozGHqgRsm7s7fBgre0x2FLM163"> https://www.rolemodels.me/courses/day-courses/</a></p> <p>Role Models website: <a href= "https://url.emailprotection.link/?bQ9roGN8AnQfIJfMnMADIZVSXhXwNDaU-jERsqx9xuenn0xXdw78iuWq8IZCKCcACE3rX4jN03K5vZTE5FuNi5Q~~"> https://www.rolemodels.me/</a></p> <p>Louise’s coaching website: <a href= "https://url.emailprotection.link/?bZteTq0xKpSNIh-S762g9YoKJOCvAx4YNYRwTlxI2MbDCWyMSf6aUHw6dAHxKQTxBUUTU7ooWoMRGwlmS-NZz0oKidyKvdXilgQ3aASysVWhB_z8mFYLg8u3E5htGLRMv"> https://www.thecoachingconcept.co.uk/</a></p> <p>Role Models Linkedin: <a href= "https://url.emailprotection.link/?bKeN-lRzne06D9dNMp9IUdA2AsAsukBb1voMZp5IKQlUm0-GaN55bgPKNCUqfClKGKGqJL9X35XirU8UPvPZZMp7eKP3RwdlJe6arIKvFnSCF1EeLgITZEX-yk84uqO4y"> https://www.linkedin.com/company/role-models-childcare-and-education</a></p> <p>Louise Treherne Linkedin: <a href= "https://url.emailprotection.link/?bIBWdKpBdS_ltdn1ilk8zSI5FmLo-LSi6ZuBkQNwefDzipnTCtHH8ksBoFpIu9h8DSI2ewbrkda4iKssESSSO36r2IQWdTMTwJtGZvEddD4juaCy7Sl0fBRHVTc9ElKL0"> https://uk.linkedin.com/in/louise-treherne-036055177</a></p>
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